So, our apartment is weird in winter, in that the upstairs is always really warm and the downstairs is always freezing. I guess heat rises, but I didn't realize there would be a 10 degree temperature shift when I walk from the stairs into the kitchen. Anyway, I digress. On with the hilarity that is Doug Parton.
Doug: "I can't do my paper when it's this cold in the house."
Doug: "I guess if Jonathan Edwards could do it, I can too."