1.05.2009

routine & change

Gentle readers, I am not a person who thrives on change. I get stressed out when we move around the living room to make a place for the Christmas tree. That’s not to say that I don’t like decorating or even that I don’t LIKE change; sometimes I just need a little convincing and patience.

I am good with routine. I like having a list of things to do and being able to check things off. Confession: sometimes when I make to-do lists, I put on something I’ve already done just so I can check it off and feel more accomplished. It’s a mind trick, and it totally works. I like feeling productive and accomplished, and a routine gives me a sense of order. When my routines get messed up – or changed – I sometimes struggle internally.

I like to reflect on things. I definitely have whimsical, daydreamy tendencies. I like sitting in silence alone with my thoughts. In fact, I rarely listen to music in the car when I’m by myself. However, I have discovered that too much alone time to think is also a bad thing for me. I get carried away with thoughts.

The return back to school was good & bittersweet, and I only changed one class. My hilarious, exasperatingly funny speech class has been replaced by a bunch of strangers. I know I’ll love these kids too, but when some of my old speech students stood at the door & waved, I felt a little pang in my heart. It was magnified when I realized that some of those students are seniors, and come next year, they’ll be gone. 99% of the time I’m just enjoying today and not worrying about tomorrow (at least with teaching…), but every once in awhile, I’ll have one of those little moments.

I’m too young to be sentimental, right?!

3 comments:

  1. I completely resonate, my friend. I find a great sense of security in routine. It is kind of a sick joke that we are teachers, as there is constant change, every year!

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  2. you dummy. of course gator rides and huronia made my profile. best. day. ever. seriously, just think about that day...you know you can't think about it without laughing. i miss you too. remember our '09 resolution :)

    (p.s. this word verification on this post is very similar to gilgal...muahahahaha)

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  3. since you confessed, i suppose i will confess. i also [very] regularly make check lists. and perhaps i put on an item [or 2] already completed and triumphantly check it off. we're so dang productive.

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