6.11.2009

facebook

This past January, Doug & I deleted our Facebook accounts. We had talked about doing it for awhile, going back and forth between the pros & cons, then one day *click!* We just did it. 

We had several reasons for deleting our accounts, with COLOSSAL WASTE OF TIME topping the charts. I'm embarrassed to admit how much time I was capable of spending, mindlessly wading through the labyrinth of faces. I would sign on to check "just one thing!" and an hour later be jealously looking at the tropical vacation of some friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend-who-we-met-at-that-one-party-and-remember-we-laughed-about-how-we-both-like-that-one-scene-from-that-one-movie-so-obviously-we'd-be-great-facebook-friends! Which brings up another point - the fact that Facebook fosters these absolutely superficial, stupid "relationships," which I will now trademark as "e-ships." Dumb!

Yeah, so we decided to sever that limb.

The next week I dealt with a barrage of students griping about the fact that I no longer had Facebook. How would I know what was going on in each of their lives? How will I know who's dating whom? (Wait, no, none of my students can use "whom" correctly...) More importantly, how will they be able to ask me useless questions 24/7? After awhile, I stopped explaining myself and just told all of them that I got rid of Facebook because I don't like them. 

I actually didn't miss Facebook. A couple times after hanging out with friends and taking pictures, they'd tell one another to "put them on Facebook!" and I'd feel a twinge of regret, but it was passing. 

When I told my friend Sara that I would be her intern this summer, she mentioned at one point how it would be so much easier for me to organize events with the kids if I had Facebook. I thought about it, realized she was right, talked to Doug & two days ago, we opened our accounts again.

Oh. My. Gosh. People have gotten engaged and married - people have had BABIES - people have broken up and are already dating new people... it's overwhelming. The first few seconds that I logged back in, I thought my brain might explode. If you ever need a slice of humble pie -proof that life moves along without you, delete your Facebook account for 6 months.

The first thing I did was what I like to call "Friend Cleanup." In other words, I deleted a bunch of people that I never talk to. Also, I de-friended all my students, except the seniors who graduated and the girls in my small group or our church youth group. That was 2 days ago, people. I already have 6 pending "friend requests" from students, messages from students and a message from an ex-boyfriend. If you don't know how to contact me outside of Facebook, then we probably shouldn't be in touch anyway. Don't get me wrong - it's fun seeing where old high school friends have ended up, what college buddies are doing, etc... but it's just so, so... ____________ (someone give me a good word - the only thing I can come up with at the moment is "blah"). 

My goal is to delete my account again at the end of summer. A lot of my friends are like, "Why don't you keep the account and just not log in?" Because I CAN'T. It's a disease. I'm like a 4-year old boy and Facebook is a scab on my knee. You try to tell a 4-year old boy not to pick that scab. I know, it's gross on multiple levels. And just to clarify, I'm not trying to guilt trip or convince anyone else to give up Facebook. This is about me and my inability to maintain a healthy balance with social networks.

Anyway - I just felt compelled to go public about my relationship e-ship with Facebook. On my blog. On the Internet. There is some poetic irony somewhere there...

9 comments:

  1. We are definitely in different places. If I were to delete my facebook account, I'd feel like I was saying goodbye to a lot of people. I wouldn't say that facebook is the only source of communication for some friends & I, but it facilitates some of the day to day communication that wouldn't happen otherwise.

    I totally get the time-waster aspect. I've started to set a timer when I check blogs/surf facebook. Not just set a time to get off, but set a literal timer that will ring and snap me out of my online trance. It helps to keep things in check AND it helps me to prioritize what I want to do when I'm online if I know I'm limited.

    I also get the "friend cleanup" thing. I get a lot of comments on my status updates from people who I don't really know and who don't really know me. And I want to say, "Shut up and mind your own business," but I really can't because I accepted their friend request and then put it out there for all of my "friends" to read.

    Also, the word verification for my comment is "catpoo." Which made me laugh . . .

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  2. I don't do facebook. I find it an incredible waste of time, and I figure that if people really wanted to talk to me, they would. I do the blog thing instead :)

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  3. Its real simple for me. My facebook is a way to glorify Christ I Cor. 10:31, and to serve as a place for those that are my friends (saved or not) to be evangelized or encouraged. Really...that simple. I guess you could call it "minding your idols" always remember to throw out the ones that you bow to.

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  4. I may have just checked facebook to see if we were still friends... glad to see I made it through the cleanup

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  5. um, how 'bout it's just so phlegmatic.
    you're amazing. you always make me laugh.
    [don't you ever EVER delete your blog. or else.]

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  6. What's facebook?

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  7. Now who do we know that would leave a comment like Anonymous did?

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  8. Didn't you listen to the Shane Hipps sermon I sent you? If not, give it a listen and then see if you feel the same about face book, e-mail. etc.

    I'm just saying is.

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  9. this was a great, great post. it made me laugh. and it is so true. and i love "e-ships". i'm going to start using that one.

    i have never been able to get that into facebook. i started it to be able to see lyx's pictures because she was always harassing me about it. i have to remind myself to actually get on it once in awhile. (in fact, i just did to make sure we were friends!).

    i never know when to use who/whom. i'm always worried about my grammar on my blog (and when i leave you comments) because i think i'm not going to be grammatically correct and then i'll get an "F" from you.

    i love that your friend sara luke told what her v. word was!!! so great! i get great amusement out of those.

    i love your header. i know i'm so behind in commenting on that.

    this was extremely long.

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