what lies beneath...

So, relatively recently, Doug & I have discovered that there is something living under our bathtub.

I was the first to discover this freeloader. Let me set the scene.

It was late afternoon/early evening, and Doug & I were both home from work. I decided I needed to do something totally unrelated to school, so I decided to go paint our laundry chute. As I walked into the bathroom and was about to sit on the floor, I heard a loud, distinct Knock. Knock. Knock. - coming from behind our shower curtain. 

You know those moments where you swear your heart stopped for a second? Yeah, that'd be one of those. I froze, staring at the bathtub in the mirror, wondering who was in our shower. I turned slowly, and quickly whipped the shower curtain back. Nothing in there. I stared for a moment, not daring to breath, until I heard a brushing noise coming from the wall, at which point I backed out as quickly & silently as possible and ran to the living room to get Doug.

 Conversation as follows:

Me, panicked look on face: "Doug. Doug. There is someone or something in our wall behind the tub."

Doug: "What?"

Me: "Please come look at it."

Doug: "Okay."

Me: "... Please take a baseball bat."

Well, a baseball bat wasn't readily available, so Doug just grabbed the closest weapon at hand - a knife that had been left on the counter. I promise I'm not making this up, nor did I steal it from a Lifetime movie.

We head into the bathroom, and of course, there's no noise whatsoever. Doug assures me that it was just "the pipes" - because, as we all know, pipes frequently knock on your walls and brush against them, creating a furry sound.

Anyway, long story short, a couple days later I heard it again, got Doug, and we both heard it. We knocked on the bathtub, and heard a scampering. So, we've been trying to figure out exactly what it is that is under our bathtub. Here is the list we've compiled thus far.

-Chipmunk

-Mouse

-Squirrel

-Black cat we've seen hanging around occasionally

*Note: I've told Doug that anything beyond this point will be cause for us to relocate.

-Raccoon (Pretty sure this is the most likely candidate, although Doug tries to assure me there are NO raccoons in Plymouth. Sorry, but if you've got trash & trees, you've got raccoons.) 

-Woodchuck

-Opossum

-Osama

-Bobby Fischer

-The Borrowers

-And my favorite - an Orc, pirating Internet, because they obviously don't have any in Mordor.

Tell me - what else could be hiding under our tub!

Although... we haven't heard any movement for a few days now, so it's either moved on... or died. Great - just what we need. A rotting Orc under our bathtub.